The Outcast 20

I wasn’t completely sure about how to deal with this complete twirl in my emotions. Caring about someone, being treated important, this was the start of my fairytale. I have dreamt of this for so long. A smile appeared on my face. I had longed for it. They say being cared for makes you strong, daring, and adventurous, so maybe that was one of the reason that despite having an intense fear of darkness, I had decided to venture out beneath the moonlight and just stroll. I was simply restless. The wind was cool and the forest outlines seemed intriguing. Gazing at the sun, I even smiled at the ‘woman of the moon’, old tales say that she keeps on weaving wool while living on the moon. I couldn’t help but notice that she looked extra lively today. Another breeze and another cool whisper made me close my eyes and breathe, simply get lost in my emotions. ‘It’s all for you.’ My eyes reopened with this memory. The full moon was partially hiding behind the clouds. Now skipping in a bubbly and overjoyed manner, not laughing at silliest things, I noticed a light coming out from a small hole which was situated somewhere behind the mansion. I decided to venture there, just decided to take the risk. The place seemed creepy. The hole had led to a huge underground-hallway which was lit by a yellow bulb light and had all of its things covered by dirty white blankets. I felt a sharp shiver jolt my soul. Curiously walking around, I noticed that place hadn’t been cleaned for a very long time. It was dusty and dirty, making me fall into a fit of sneezes. Dust allergies, UGH!!! Lightly running my fingers over the dirty blankets, I noticed an old wooden door partially hidden behind a huge cupboard. I decided to walk towards that door. Nervously turning its rusty doorknob, I stepped inside and saw extremely dangerous types of equipment hanging from the walls of a huge and white-lit room. Another door was again leading away from this new room. However, upon quickly rushing towards that door, I was just about to reach it when I felt something sting my right foot. What now??? Looking down, I noticed a small and sharp metal rod sticking out of my toe. It didn’t seem to have gone deep, so I thought that I could simply pull it out, I notice a small silver-thread leading away from it, my soul blanched in complete fear, as I realized that the silver thread led straight up to a small black-cannon and was wrapped around its trigger knob. One pull meant that I would be hit by a deadly metal ball. Immediate tears began falling out of my eyes. How was I going to escape this? This place was clearly a trap meant to prevent others from entering whatever was behind door number ‘THREE’. I had been a fool to venture down this place. It had been a mistake. Now nobody knew that I was here, the pain in my toe was growing intense, and I knew that I would move. This was horrible. I had been too caught up in living my fairytale, lately. Crumbling into a terrified mess, soon my heart started squeezing with a faint assurance that Carmen would show up. He won’t accept my disappearance for long. He would come for me. I knew it. I had to stay strong until he showed up for me. I couldn’t give up. Trying to keep myself composed and calm, I worked to keep my breaths even and not make a lot of movements. Any wrong move could be it for me. However, my composure fell when the bulb light started dimming above my head, making me whimper in fear and panic. This was probably part of the trap; force one to move by inducing dark terror. Carmen, come quickly! The walls had started suffocating my soul, and I could feel hysteria building up. I hated the darkness - the ambiguity and blankness that lied within it. My heart twisted in terror. Carmen. Immediately, like my cry had been heard, feet began stomping towards the door from which I had entered, and I found gleam in my soul returning. Was he here? However, instead of Carmen, they were lady guards carrying huge guns, bags and torches in their hands. They looked equipped in their hands. They looked equipped enough to help, but where was Carmen? He had to be here, too. Curiously eyeing the ladies, I watched as they gazed at my trapped stance and nodded to each other. ‘Place a metal sheet before the cannon’s hole and give me a pair of pliers,’ the leader of the group ordered out loud to her team, making them immediately spring into action. The tears on my face immediately evaporated. I was going to be rescued. With two guards working to block the cannon’s hole, all actions paused for a second as we heard feet rush towards this room. They were light, depicting that the person wasn’t wearing any shoes. Alert and attentive, the guards, who were simply standing, raised their guns high and got into action. ‘Move’, A strict order made that all jolt lower their heads. It was Carmen. He was here. I knew it. It only made perfect sense when he came to rescue, every single piece only made sense, then. Feeling my soul completely relax with the firm belief that since Carmen was here, he would easily handle everything, I suppressed a small smile. Safety, protection, I was feeling protected, again, and chose to keep my gaze firmly towards my toe, head completely lowered. Quickly obeying Carmen’s orders, the guards swiftly moved aside and allowed him to deal with the situation. He instantly stomped towards the cannon and began disabling it. A sudden loud CLICKS assured me of that. After disabling the cannon, he then turned towards the guards and sternly spoke, ‘have that rod instantly pulled out of her foot and then have her taken to the clinic. I don’t care if there is no doctor on duty. I want her reports to be cleared in fifteen minutes. And after that, have someone lock these rooms. This kind of mistake will not be tolerated in the future.’ There was an odd sensation of coldness twirling in his tone, but I didn’t care because the giddiness was back. Eagerly having the rod pulled out of my foot, I excitedly jumped to my feet, not even waiting for the guards to help me up, and soon found myself losing balance. I had underestimated my pain. However, in an attempt to not hit the floor, I hastily grabbed on a nearby stand and paled as shrieks and yells began vociferating in the air, with Carmen’s caution-yell being the loudest and most roaring of them all. ‘Sarah, don’t’ Too late because, soon, I felt something hard hit the back of my neck and push me into a state of unconsciousness. While saving me from one trap, I had managed to get caught by another. I woke up in my ‘mansion’ room, and the first thing that came to my mind was that Carmen had saved me. He rescued me, the giddiness, the awe, the back of my head was throbbing, but my soul was happy. My fairytale beginning. This was it. I was going to accept and say yes. A whole fantasy began running through my head, the look on the faces of those who always degraded me would be priceless. IT’s true when they said that losing someone means you will gain someone better. Carmen treated me as his world, unlike Bradley. I had never felt so wanted. The sunlight was now completely engulfing my room, and there was no one to company me, making me wonder where everyone was. But I didn’t care, as I joyfully got up and rushed out of my room, feeling a swing in my stance. I had to find Carmen and tell him that my answer was yet, that I had accepted. He needed to know. Having a constant grin accompany me, I skittled down the staircase and eagerly looked around. There was literally no one in the mansion. What give, Where was everyone? Feeling baffled, I headed towards the kitchen and was about to go outside from its backdoor when I heard Carmen’s voice booming right outside the backdoor. ‘I don’t care. I want all of my men to be on alert. Aisha just broke up with her fiancé, and I need her to be brought to my southern lands right now.’ What? Aisha? ‘What do you mean what about Sarah? Throw her back to where we got her from. I need to get Aisha now! Bradley is in jail, there couldn’t be a better opportunity for me, so talk to the commissioner and make sure that Bradley stays in prison for at least five more years. We have to get the girl. Understood?’ THERE IS A MYSTERY HIDDEN IN THE FOLDS OF MISERY. Anguished, crushed and utterly heartbroken, I couldn’t believe my ears. Aisha, the girl whom everyone just seemed to pick over me, this all had been for her? It had always been her? No, Carmen, he wouldn’t do this to me. He wouldn’t use me for a ploy or a simple pass of time to get another girl. I meant the world to him, was his deepest obsession and fresh healing air. And these emotions, they couldn’t be faked, manipulated, I had seen them, believed in them, and felt secured by their shade. Yet, why was my heart believing this lie, this misunderstanding? Why was this complete betrayal making perfect sense? Not being able to take the agony and shock, I began rushing out of the kitchen, not even caring as thick tears hurriedly flowed down my cheeks. This was torturous, a crushing heartbreak. Reality, it had never felt so heavy on my shoulders. Rushing up the staircase, feeling the cold marble turn frigid under my feet, I literally barged into my ‘mansion’ room and collapsed on the floor. No, No, No. Carmen, this illusion. It couldn’t be a lie. I couldn’t have been so easily manipulated and toyed with, especially when those emotions that led me to - UGH! Why was this shattering betrayal making perfect sense? Why was I feeling like the biggest fool in the world? The warnings had been there, Jean had hinted to me of the precautions, yet I still chose to let the same old pain shatter my heart again. Even Bradley’s rejection hadn’t been this crushing and agonizing, my heart was refusing to untangle, and my soul, it felt completely abandoned and alone. I had ruined my air by trusting a psycho. Not even bothering to wipe my tears away. I felt like clawing at my soul in anger and hurt. Why was I so gullible? Carmen, he had been a true monster. So cunningly, so manipulatively, he had toyed with my emotions and actually tortured me in the worst ways. I was completely crushed. It had always been Aisha. Jean had warned me that Carmen was chasing after someone else before me. He had wanted someone else but found a weak punching bag instead. How else did he get to know about me? I had always been kept in the shelter of my home, protected between the four walls. My existence only became apparent because of Aisha, my association with the rich class. Oh, my heart, I was feeling completely broken under the excruciating feeling of being betrayed and replaced, again. Was that how everyone saw me? Was my existence that mediocre and weak that people just couldn’t help but take a swing at it? First the bullies, then Bradley, and now Carmen? Ingenious of him, Carmen had been the biggest oppressor of them all, He had actually woven this whole fantasy for me, forced me to care at such extent that I don’t think there was any coming back for me. I had never felt this low, this lonely and this destroyed. Well played, Carmen. This girl truly did let her emotions become her greatest weakness. “It would be disingenuous to say I don’t have some sensitivity to the seamy side of issues.” JFK