The Outcast 10

‘Sofie…’ ‘What’ I neared her in confusion. Her room was so small, only comprising of one wooden bed, a brown side-table and a white rocking chair. The wooden planks were actually creaking beneath my feet. Such a shabby house. ‘Sofie.’ She turned to give me a smile. I shivered. She was so old, so elderly and lost. ‘My boy loves Sofie, she makes food, cleans, she is happy,’ the old lady kept on speaking gibberish, making me sit near her feet and gently grabbed her hands. ‘Ma’am, I am not Sofie,’ I gave her a weak smile, feeling incredibly sad for this lady. ‘I am Sarah.’ ‘No, Sofie, Sofie,’ she started screaming, tightening the grip on my hand in frustration. ‘Sofie!’ ‘Okay!’ I hurriedly gave in, rubbing her knuckles in comfort. ‘What do you want to say to Sofie?’ ‘My boy doesn’t hurt, he didn’t mean to hurt her. He cared about her,’ she nearly sobbed, making a sharp sense of dread suddenly strike my heart. ‘Ma’am, who is Sofie?’ I asked with caution, fearful of the answer. ‘My Carmie’s wife, my Carmie’s wife, he cared for his Sofie, married her here, Sofie, don’t leave him. He didn’t mean to hurt you, it was an accident, a mistake,’ the woman suddenly pleading me in desperation, a fit probably provoked by my presence. I felt growing completely washed out and pale. Carmen, he has done it all before, brought a girl here, married her and then, what happened to her? Was she safe? Did he kill her? Where was this Sofie? Suddenly, a loud slamming of the front door echoed from outside and Carmen’s booming voice echoed throughout the house. ‘Sarah, I am finally home. And look what I brought along, a marriage licence, 3 witnesses, and a scholar. Time to get married.’ He was begging, sobbing while bent on his knees, loud fists were being punched against the living room’s walls. There were pleas, disturbing cries and more begging. I felt so seriously traumatized and scared. After having Carmen announce that he was here to marry me. I had grown sickly pale and worried. Terror was tangling my nerves and anxiety swirling in my brain. This wasn’t happening, not to me. I couldn’t, wouldn’t. This would destroy my whole future, be something so irreversible. Timidly stepping out of the elderly woman’s room, I had jumped when Carmen started clapping loudly, celebrating the next step of his life. A meek no had immediately been whispered by my soul while Jean was there to enjoy the show. However, Carmen wasn’t going to accept ‘no’, so I had to quickly rush towards the kitchen and lock myself inside it. I didn’t know what to do. This would buy me some time, some freedom. Curling behind the kitchen island, with two forks grabbed by my shaking hands, I was trembling as Carmen created havoc outside. The kitchen door was being occasionally kicked, furniture was being thrown around. There was anger, delusional denial, and then, there were the threats; snakes, basements, prison, I was being threatened with everything. I have never felt so scared in my life. Wishing to be rescued as soon as possible, I had cupped my ears in terror as the voices grew louder. Jean was trying to calm the beast outside. ‘Boss, she will listen. Give her time, give her time.’ ‘Why is she refusing? This is our home. Why is she saying no? Did you brainwash her? Sarah wasn’t like this. You did this. She is refusing because of YOU. Tell her to change her mind, tell her to say yes at once, or else--’ ‘Boss,’ she tried to reason with him. ‘I promise I didn’t say anything to her. She is just shy. Give her some time.’ ‘No.’ His words sounded like a ferocious growl. ‘This is supposed to be our new start, away from them, away from everyone. She is finally home, now. I will have her care. I will NOT take a no. Tell her to open the kitchen door at once.’ ‘Boss, you are scaring her. Please, calm down.’ ‘Scaring her?’ his voice boomed out loud. ‘Why the heck does she need to be scared of me? Doesn’t she know I care, that I am the only one who cares.’ There was a pause followed after that, and suddenly he began maliciously laughing out loud. ‘She said no.’ he was roaring with laughter. ‘NO,NO,NO’ Slowly, his laughter was getting mixed with sobs. I felt so traumatized and disturbed, trying to distract myself by looking outside the kitchen window and staring at the full moon. I had to get away from here as soon as possible. This guy, he will surely kill. ‘They all just say no.’ Suddenly, his voice turned s o agonized and pain that I found my own heart clenching in melancholy. These emotions, they were raw, coming straight from his heart. This man, he was terribly broken. I felt so conflicted. Shakily getting up, I heard collapsing on the floor (right in front of the kitchen door) and wailing in pain. ‘They say no, everyone just says no. She is the only one I care about. She says no, too..’ ‘Boss, you need to calm down. It’s okay. She doesn’t mean.’ ‘No,’ A heavy and furious fist was punched against the kitchen door. ‘I will make her care. She can’t say no. I will make her care. Everything I do is for her.’ And with that, he got up and stomped out of the house. Slamming the door behind. My heart jumped at the loud sound. Cautiously heading towards the kitchen door, I nervous unlocked it and slightly pushed it open. Jean was standing right outside it. At my sight, she scowled and kicked the kitchen door open wide, pushing me away with it. ‘What the hell?’ I screeched. ‘You have really created a big mess,’ she folded her arms, raising one eyebrow at me. I grew agape. ‘Me? Are you serious? That deranged psychopath, I need to get away from him. He is deadly insane. You have to get me out of here. He will be back at any time. Please, save me before he comes back,’ My voice grew shaky, causing Jean to huff and roll her eyes in annoyance. ‘You don’t get it, do you? He wouldn’t let you go’ ‘That’s is why I am asking me to help me escape while he is away,’ I cried, nearing her. ‘Please, he won’t spare me. If he comes back, he will torture, probably throw me in front of his snakes. I gave to get away.’ I pleaded, desperately wiping my tears. Jean only eyed me with distaste. ‘Did you hear him? He is broken, crushed and wounded by your rejection. Trust me, he isn’t going to hurt you. In fact, now he is going to work on impressing you, anything to get a brat, like you, pay him attention. But you are still not over that loser ‘Bradley’, right? No matter what anyone does for you, you are just going to complain because your perfect fairytale had an ogre looking for you attention. Learn to look around yourself instead of whining about your own problems. There are bigger problems than you being wanted by someone you don’t believe is worthy of you.’ I stepped back stung, feeling like someone had slapped me right across my face. This woman, I had once noticed her sharing some sympathy for me. She had once been truly frightened for me, but she truly only cared about Carmen. I was simply someone who wasn’t worthy of her loved ones; a prick in a bed of roses. This was an extremely messed up situation. Surrounded by people so mentally ruined, I didn’t know how long I would be able to keep my own sanity. I felt so lonely and deserted. I felt like this was the moment I truly broke. Jean’s cold façade seemed to crack, for just a second, as she eyed one lone tear trickling down my face. They say if one tear falls from your left eye first, it’s the tear of sheer sorrow. Slumping her shoulders for one second, she turned away from me and began heading towards the main door. ‘Trust me, I am not the bad person here,’ she vaguely spoke. ‘This situation is messed up, but then again, you never gave us a chance, and I am not just talking about the past few months. Think about it.’ And with that, she walked out of the house, making me wince. Not talking about the past few days? What? Did I know her from before? It didn’t make any sense. Jean’s words had left my heart tangled in an uncomfortable manner. Why did she seem like she was holding a grudge against me? And Why did I feel like it had nothing to do with me not being good enough for Carmen? Jolene was so focused on the files strewn on her table, She found a file dated ‘15/05/17’ - Highlighted in neon pink, were these words, There But For the Grace of God, Go I…’ exhaling a deep breath she did not understand whom Carmen was referring Too. As far as her bible knowledge afforded her she knew it referred to the passage in 1 Cor 15:8-10, ‘Last of all, as to one born ABNORMALLY, he appeared to me.’ but this verse also refers to a group of prisoners. Was Carmen telling them that someone he knew was in prison? Does Jolene have something to do with that specific case?

"There is many a slip twixt cup and lip"